Ladies and gentlemen, grab your popcorn because we're about to embark on a comedic journey into the world of BMW and their oh-so-witty attempt at subscription services.
Hold onto your seats, quite literally!
Once upon a time, in the mystical year of 2022, BMW decided to unleash a maelstrom of fury in the automotive world.
How, you ask? By offering heated seats as a subscription service!
Yes, you read that right. They had cars with built-in seat warmers, and instead of just letting folks enjoy the warmth, they decided to make them pay for it like it was the latest streaming platform.
Picture this: you've just splurged on a shiny new BMW, and you're all excited to feel the luxurious warmth of those heated seats. You push the button, and then it hits you like a snowball to the face - "Subscribe now for cozy buns!" Your reaction? Priceless.
BMW's master plan was to charge extra for something your car already had, and the owners weren't exactly thrilled. They expected the car to be warm, not their wallets! But wait, there's more! Fast forward to the present, and BMW's board member for sales and marketing, Pieter Nota, finally emerged from his secret lair to share some insights.
He spilled the beans in an interview with Autocar, admitting that their cunning subscription scheme didn't exactly set the world on fire. In a tone that can only be described as "Oops, our bad," Nota declared, "What we don't do anymore - and that is a very well-known example - is offer seat heating by this way. It's either in or out."
Bravo, BMW, you've finally mastered the art of simplicity. "We thought that we would provide an extra service to the customer by offering the chance to activate that later, but the user acceptance isn't that high." Oh, really? People didn't want to pay twice for heated seats? Shocker! Apparently, BMW realized that perception is indeed reality (and math isn't everyone's strong suit).
So, they pulled the plug on the heated seat subscription service, leaving us all wondering what they'll charge for next. But fear not, fellow car enthusiasts, because BMW isn't giving up on their quest to monetize every possible aspect of their vehicles. They're now turning their attention to what they call "functions on demand."
These are like software and service-related goodies you can add later, kinda like ordering extra cheese on your pizza. Nota explained, "What we find is software-based services, like downloading a parking assist product, is very well accepted. People know it's a certain piece of software they can download that costs money." So, basically, if you want your car to park itself, you just download the feature like it's a mobile app. Easy-peasy, right?
In conclusion, BMW has finally seen the light (and the humor) and decided to let heated seats be what they were always meant to be - a standard, toasty feature without the extra subscription nonsense. As for the future, who knows what's next? Perhaps a subscription service for windshield wipers, because why should they swipe for free? Stay tuned for more hilarious automotive adventures from the world of BMW!
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